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[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

Who: Kuja and Maria
What: So a villain and an archer walk into a bar...
Where: Treno
When: During the airship auction.
Rating: PG

Treno was a city of lights and noise and unrelenting life. Its days were short, its nights were long, and because of this peculiar solar cycle it never truly seemed to sleep. Its residents kept no particular schedule and neither did the shops and restaurants that served them; if something was closed at three in the afternoon it was simply too bad, although most of the larger establishments simply hired more workers to keep themselves open all the time. The commoners' district had rotted away in poverty, the nobles' brimmed over with lavish excess, and a middle class was hardly present at all.

Kuja adored the nobles' district. He'd made Treno his home away from home for one reason and one reason only: its overindulgence, its vibrant, shameless, immutable glut, sang to him like the sweetest of violins. Here a man could spend his life's savings and have absolutely nothing to show for it when he awoke in a gutter somewhere several days later. It was the perfect place, then, to bring someone who loved throwing away money almost as much as he did.

But first there was Neo Bahamut to deal with. It couldn't enter the city without causing mass panic, couldn't even land too close, and as he dismounted and prepared to walk the rest of the way he sighed gustily, blowing a few loose hairs from his eyes. "This is why I've found myself in the market for an airship recently," he said, offering his hand to Maria to help her off if she wished. "She's worse than a pink elephant. I can't take her anywhere."

Only Kuja would complain about having to fly here and there on his very own dragon.

After Maria was down in one way or another, he gave the massive beast a jab with his cane. "Get, you horrible thing," he ordered, not without affection, and while the look it gave him suggested that it was tempted to bite his prodding arm off it turned and slunk away.

Comments

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

The huntress nodded and immediately set off along the path to Treno. The walk wasn't much of a bother to her. She was used to trekking out in the mud, dirt, rain, and general yuckiness of the real world. She had to back when she, Firion and Guy were after the Emperor, and her job of tracking down criminals also demanded it. After all, those cheeky little bastards had habits of putting their hideouts in the most out of reach and nearly unlivable place.

"Thanks for the concern, milord, but I'm sure a hawker will find an arrow in his hand if he tries." she laughed heartily. That itself was the truth as well. Her job had left her with extra sensitivity to being touched, so she knew when someone was trying to lift her purse right off her sash. As she had said, more often than not the thief had both an arrow in his hand and a fist to his jaw before he knew what had happened.

When the gates of Treno came up, Maria immediately felt a bit of disdain growing in her gut. She would never live in a place like this, even with all its glory. She preferred quieter living far from a city. The most ideal would be a modest house in the midst of a ranch out in the countryside, chocobos and horses to run the land, orchards miles long, and even a few livestock. Naturally there would be a husband to help her run it all somewhere along the line. Impossible? Perhaps, but it was a more honest and worthwhile dream than, say, building a mansion in Treno for thieves to gawk at with unbridled lust.

"Looks like a right amount of fun, don't you think?" she asked, turning toward Kuja and grinning.

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

For Kuja, entering the splendor of the waterfront was like slipping into a hot bath at the end of a very long, cold day. More than one Espan poet had written at length about the Dark City, and with good reason; to the upper crust who dwelt there, and the nouveau riche who came simply because they could, Treno held a certain kind of magic. It was full of the heady vitality that only comes from people who are drunk on their own existence, and Kuja appreciated that all the more these days. Treno was not simply a place to see and be seen now. The energy surrounding him made him feel so alive that he feared he'd burst at the seams.

"It always is," he breathed, and the smile he wore was not the studied, faintly predatory expression he usually donned. It reached his eyes and lit up his entire face, producing a flicker of a much different man--anyone who knew him even passingly, let alone a closer "acquaintance" like Zidane or Garnet, would likely have been puzzled by it at the very least. This was not the aristocratic, patronizing thespian that the world had seen for the past two-and-some decades; this Kuja was almost giddy with excitement. "Come on, then! I believe I'll get you two drinks. Mm? I'm sure somebody around here can make a daiquiri..."

And on that note, he seized Maria's hand without preamble and tried to drag her off, presumably to whatever overpriced restaurant he was thinking of.

Pushy? Him? Noo.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

Again she just laughed and let him lead her along as he chose. As they trotted along to the location only her companion had in mind, she took the time to take in all the sights and sounds of Treno. She could definitely understand why people would want to live there, even if she never would want to. In a city of sin, none could be called guilty.

However, thieving hands didn't stay away from the purple-haired woman as they walked. She felt a hand try to take the intricately carved and polished composite bow from her back. She halted to a stop, jerking her hand from Kuja's in the process, and turned to send a fist straight into the thief's face. The young man cried out as a sickening crack split the air, and blood gushed from the broken nose he now sported.

"It's impolite to touch a lady without her permission." she said, shaking her hand to brush off the shock of impact. As the thief lay groaning on the ground, the archer turned back to Kuja and offered her other hand. "My apologies. Do continue leading."

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

They were in a hurry--well, Kuja was in a hurry. He wasn't running, but he strode at a brisk clip and maybe that made them look nervous and therefore like easy prey. Or maybe the would-be thief just really, really wanted a new bow. Either way, the interruption was unwelcome. Kuja looked over his shoulder when Maria let go all of a sudden, then turned around entirely to scowl at the man, who looked like he was regretting his line of work.

"Quite. Did any of his blood get on you? Here." He whisked out a handkerchief from some cleverly hidden breast pocket and passed it over. It was silk.

Of course.

"Now, then--" His gaze fell on a little bar tucked away between a concession shop and a clothing boutique. The sign proclaimed Catoblepas and featured an etching of its namesake with a bottle of something alcoholic in its mouth. He'd never seen it before; it must have opened since the last time he was here. "I've never been in there," he said, echoing his thoughts out loud. "I suppose the promise is that you'll be too sloshed to lift your head if you drink there." He laughed. "How perfectly delightful. Shall we?"

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

"Oh, thank you." she smiled, daubing her hand with the handkerchief to remove the few specks of blood that spotted it. She did pause for a moment beforehand, noticing the fabric was a fine silk. It seemed like such a shame to dirty so lovely a thing with red, but one look at her finely dressed friend shot the worry down. He could afford a good cleaning if he wanted.

As they continued their trek, she fell in step with Kuja even as her eyes wandered the area. Idly she wondered they must look like quite the pair. A woman who, while not weathered or battle-hardened in appearance, was clearly a fighter and dressed to kill, and a lovely man who himself attracted the eyes of women and men. It was really quite delightful.

A smirk lit across her lips as she caught sight of the bar up ahead. It definitely looked like a fun time if one went by looks alone.

"But of course. Who could refuse the promise of good drink and possibly good company?"

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

Or he could afford to simply--

Well. The thief probably had diseases. When Kuja took the length of fabric back he balled it in his hands and flung it into the reservoir, relishing the splash and an odd look or two from some men who noticed it flying through the air. Their stares became warier after a moment, perhaps because they'd seen his companion lay that unfortunate young man out flat.

"I believe you have some admirers," he observed, grinning, but when he turned that toothy, heavy-lidded smile on them they decided it might be a good idea to hurry on their way lest they be perceived as looking for trouble as well. "Oh, never mind. Can't imagine what spooked them."

The bar was small but, like the rest of the bourgeois quarter, dramatic. It overflowed with gold and dark marble and tall, arched windows provided a view of the lamp-lit streets and the glimmering water not far away. It toed the line between extravagance and ridiculousness, managing, somehow, to come out on the side of the former.

Kuja's manner of dress fit right in here. Maria's bow did not, and although the bartender was too polite to say anything, he did look a bit nervous when he saw it. "Can I help you?" he asked instead, eyeing the weapon.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

Her eyes trailed the ball of silk as it flew through the air and landed with a plunk in the water. It seemed like such a waste of good silk. She just shrugged it off, as she did his remark about her having admirers.

Once they came into the bar, her eyes drank in the atmosphere with abandon. Definitely wasn't a two-bit kind of place, that's for sure. No doubt the prices were jacked up to the ceiling. Maria wouldn't have been surprised if they had to pay a sitting fee. She noticed the bartender's unease upon seeing her weapon and immediately she flashed him a smile.

"Don't worry, I won't start firing unless someone else starts it. You have my word." she said cordially even as she picked out a place to sit.

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

The bartender didn't look entirely convinced. There were a great many pubs on Gaia where one could show up armed to the teeth and nobody would bat an eye, but this one, catering largely to people who owned weapons only as display pieces, was not one of them. "Are you an adventurer?" he asked cautiously. He seemed to not know how to deal with this possibility.

Kuja didn't particularly care. He sat himself beside Maria and arched an eyebrow at the man.

"Never mind that. The lady will have a strawberry daiquiri, and I'll have..." A passing tray of drinks caught his eye and he trailed off to look at them. They were huge, brightly-colored, and embellished with slices of fruit and little plastic swords. "Do those come in blue?"

"Ah, err, yes. It's called a Blue Kilika. It's got rum, pineapple juice and--"

Kuja silenced him with a careless wave of his hand. "I never said I cared what was in it," he sniffed.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

"I'm a...hunter." she said, shrugging lightly. To help ease the bartender's nerves, she slipped the bow and quiver from her back and sat them down beside her feet. All the while, she was trying not to giggle at how flippantly Kuja was behaving toward the man. He certainly seemed like a noble.

The bartender had her drink to her in no time at all, and the huntress let out a happy sigh. She could blame Princess Hilda for introducing her to liquor, but thankfully she also picked up the princess' sense of moderation.

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

Between an archer and a noncy but somehow faintly intimidating slip of a man, the bartender had his work cut out for him. He looked over at them frequently as he prepared their drinks, but Kuja paid him absolutely no mind.

"So," he started, leaning against the bar and kicking his feet up on his stool, "you said you've come here before?" He propped his chin up on his hands only to straighten right back up again a few seconds later as their drinks were placed in front of them. He sniffed his, then shrugged and had a sip.

"Brilliant!" he decided, and had another.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

"Hmm?" the archer blinked a few times as she sipped at her own drink. "No, I've never been to Treno. Places like it, yes, but not this place in particular."

She took to enjoying her daiquiri as Kuja had at his own cocktail. She couldn't help but be amused at the contrast in drinks. Hers was pink and his was blue...how ironic, considering the lovely man's manner.

"Not to ruin the mood, good lord, but are we going to part ways after this? Or will we return to the auction hall together?" she asked, lightly toying with the strawberry that floated on the surface of the pink cocktail.

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

"No?" Kuja sounded faintly puzzled; he'd thought that Maria had said something about visiting Treno before. He must have misheard. "Then you ought to drop by Knight's Weapons at some point, if you're in need of anything." He pulled the plastic sword from his drink and nipped the cherry from it, his eyes closing. Seldom did a man ever look so pleased by something so simple. "Good selection there. They've got exploding arrows. Well, they did for a while. I think there was some fuss about them going off when dropped, and there might have been a lawsuit involved, so maybe they aren't on the shelves anymore..."

He trailed off, shrugging his narrow shoulders, and grinned crookedly when she asked what his plans were after this. "We'll be returning together, naturally. I believe you had the highest bid when we left, and that simply must be rectified."

That's what he said, but it was obvious after he drained his glass and ordered a refill that one drink was going to turn into two and Hades only knew how many more after that. They were just so tasty, and the company was infinitely more agreeable than listening to a cat and an old man argue over who could best whom.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

Exploding arrows? That was certainly a new one, albeit one that sounded incredibly useful. Maria made a mental note to find this Knight's Weapons shop if her companion ended up sloshed right out of his good state of mind. Given his behavior regarding his drink, she didn't doubt that was exactly what would happen in only a few more Blue Kilikas.

"Oho? Rest assured, the victory won't be yours without a fight, my fine feathered friend." she added the 'feather' quip only because of the few bits of hair she noticed resembled feathers. Honestly she didn't know whether they were accessories or actual feathers sprouting from his scalp.

Still, the day had been rather lovely. The auction had alleviated her boredom somewhat, allowed her to possibly empty her coffers, and had given her a rather nice new drinking buddy. All in all, it was looking to be a very nice night.

"So what do you do for a living, milord? Your wealth must come from somewhere."

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

"That," Kuja held up a finger pedantically, "is quite all right. I like a challenge, my dear. It makes the inevitable victory so much more satisfying." Apparently that was more important than paying a fair price for the airship, but nothing about him suggested that he had any need or wish to be frugal (or even reasonable) with his money.

He had another sip of his drink, making a little noise around the rim of the glass when Maria asked him just how he made all his gil. It sounded suspiciously like a laugh, and, indeed, when he put the cup down he was grinning.

"Not bloody much, to tell you the truth," he confided, leaning in and lowering his voice--likely for dramatic effect more than anything else. "I own a share of King's Auction House down the road, although the whole place may as well be mine. King is such a pushover."

The idea of Kuja as some sort of businessman sounded ridiculous, given his rather fickle personality, but even the gaudiest of nobles had made his fortune somehow. He laughed again as he straightened up, waving a slender hand dismissively, and added: "Before that, I was in the weapons business. It got dull, so here," he raised his glass again, "I am."

If by dull he meant that mask outlived its usefulness, which he did.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

The huntress eyed the regal villain, amusement written across her fine features. Her line of work demanded she be able to read people like a book, as a simple look or gesture could determine the guilt or innocence of the one you caught. People spoke volumes about their character in the way they presented themselves. As such, Kuja was telling her many things, and yet not much at all. There was truth in his words, judging by how flippantly he remembered the past, and whatever part of it he crafted out of lies was almost indiscernible from the truth.

"I suppose a former weapons dealer would know the best place to find weaponry then, hm? Good thing I managed to bid on the same airship." she tilted back in the stool slightly so she rested against the small back of it. "Myself, I suppose I'm the opposite end. I came from a more humble place far, far from here."

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

There was no guilt on Kuja's face or in his voice, only the remaining traces of a smile. His lies were entwined closely with the truth, but even beyond that he could have had a marvelous career as an actor if he'd wished. Or a politician. He saw no need to tell Maria anything about why he'd called himself a weapons dealer for a while; she'd likely take issue with it and it would be a shame for the evening to end on a sour note. There was a time and a place for everything, and Kuja, Destroyer of Worlds and Kicker of Puppies had no place to be at the moment. Other villains were antisocial, brooding in their lairs and despising humanity. He was the opposite, especially when he had no current agenda other than enjoying himself.

"Did you? There must be an interesting story behind the acquisition of your own wealth." He looked away to peer into his glass and was startled to find it mostly empty again. Hmm. He really was terrible with moderation.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

"Heh, not hardly." she laughed a little. She quickly ordered a refill of her daiquiri and took a much delighted sip. "Due to circumstances beyond my control, I just had to grow up faster than I wanted to."

She paused for a moment to consider her next words. The need to tell someone else the story of her and her friends' quest to stop Emperor Mateus wasn't very strong. She herself didn't even like reflecting on those days she spent fighting monsters, agents of the emperor, and even the dark lunatic himself. No need to drag out that story to someone who probably wasn't interested.

"Things were just too quiet for me after all was said and done. So I figured I could put my new worldliness to use by tracking down criminals who evaded the law." she laughed suddenly. "Though none of the big ones. While the gil attached to them would make someone very happy, only fools run after the tough targets. It's best to just nab the small time crooks by the hundreds and make a killing off their collective worth."

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

"Ah. You're a bounty hunter, then? Plenty of work for those here. Well, in every city, I suppose." Kuja pushed his glass away, wordlessly signaling for another refill, and although the bartender gave him a look that had oh, great written all over it he didn't argue. Kuja stared thoughtfully at the counter in the meantime, tracing little whorls into it with a finger. What would Maria think if she knew who she was really sitting next to?

He glanced up when the bartender set his third drink in front of him, smiling again. "I'd like to propose a toast," he said abruptly, lifting the glass. "To having outrageous amounts of money, and nothing better to spend it on."

"I'll drink to that!" some man slurred from further down along the bar, and was hushed by one of his friends.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

"That I am. Been at it for several years now, perhaps three or four I believe." she smiled widely. Even if she knew who he was, she wasn't stupid. Sure, she had defeated a man of equal or greater power than he, but that had only been with her friends. By her lonesome, she most likely would have died or become part of Emperor Mateus' personal harem for all she knew. Probably would have been the former. No, small time criminals were more her style. The stronger marks were best left to stronger fellows.

"I hear that," she laughed at the drunken man and also raised her own glass. "To having outrageous amounts of money, and not a single worthwhile thing to buy with it. Also, here's to having that money burn holes in our wallets."

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

Kuja's smile returned, small and satisfied, when Maria echoed his toast. "To many years of decadence to come," he added, "and to the enjoyment of every one." What a perfectly hedonistic thing to drink to. So very Treno, really.

He clinked their glasses together and drank. Then, as something else occurred to him, he waved the poor bartender over again. "Would you like something to eat?"

He didn't do well with moderation and apparently he didn't do well with time management either. It may have had something to do with the fact that he'd spent so long in a city with no regard at all for any sort of organization.

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

Maria swallowed the last of her insanely pink cocktail and let out a happy sigh. What a wonderful day it had been. It made her so happy she felt like going out and finding the next bounty she had scheduled.

"No, I'm not very hungry," she said, shaking her head a little, "In fact, I probably should be getting back about now."

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

Kuja stared regretfully at his own drink, but didn't push it away. "That might be a good idea," he allowed. "I, on the other hand, am starving. Are you able to get back on your own? I may stay for a bite to eat and follow along shortly."

Or, more probably, he'd have another drink, lose track of time, wake up gods only knew how many hours later at his apartment, and end up having to bum someone's phone off of them to call in a last-minute bid instead.

If the system worked...

[soul-of-artemis.livejournal.com]

"Yes, don't worry. I've got a nice set of wings to lift me on out of here." she said with a smile. The auction was all but forgotten in her mind, but then she had never really been too serious about it in the first place. Just a thing to pass the time, after all.

Maria slid off the bar stool and gave a slight bow. "Milord, may we meet again someday soon and share drinks together. Until then, take care of yourself."

She rose up from the bow with the smile still on her face. With nothing else left to say, she turned and left the bar. Thankfully, the thieves that littered the streets seemed to recognize her from the incident what took place earlier and left her well enough alone.

Once she was safely outside Treno's outskirts, the archer summoned Valefor. The sight of the small dragon creature pushed the thought of robbing her from the minds of the few thieves who had trailed after her. Without giving thought to them, the huntress climbed onto Valefor's back and the beast soared into the sky.

[immoralkuja.livejournal.com]

"Excellent." As Maria stood Kuja briefly lifted his drink again in valediction, returning her bow. "I look forward to it. Farewell, my lady."

The bartender was relieved to see Maria go, or more accurately, to see her bow and arrows go--she'd been polite, but just having a weapon in the building made him nervous. He breathed a sigh of relief and then remembered that he still had one more to go when Kuja slid into a seat closer to him, bringing his drink along. "So!" he said brightly. "I think I'm in the mood for steak. Do you have a menu?"

It was going to be a long night.

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